Christmassed!

Christmas Eve and Day was AWESOME! I spend time with immediate and extended family, and enjoyed delicious food cooked by my Mom:)

I was especially blest this year as I received an oven prior to Christmas, as my gift from my Mom and Dad. My brothers bought me Dvds of favorite shows. My brother Scotty bought my the first season boxed set of MacQyver and I still can't get the them song out of my head, or the cheest acting for that matter:) My younger brother got me "Batman Aminated" Season 2 and "Ben 10" Season One! I enjoy cartoons very much!

I was blest most of all by giving and watched my niece Erin, nephew Quin and soon to be new member of the family Kaitlyn open gifts from Santa! They read the letters and I watched the joy on everyones face as they read!

It is good to be a member of the ROCK and take part in spreading joy and gifts to other less fortunate like the moms. dads and kids of Jefferson elementary!

I love this time of year and am anxious for the all church conferance in Lake of the Ozarks Missouri!

I almost forgot one thing! I never asked Santa why an ice monster and then a fiery beast where chasing after me when I took the Item? Those type of things are not Santa's style!

I called Santa on my cell phone and left a message since he was probably still sleeping?

For now it must remain a mystery!

Next Time! "FaithWalking"

Peace!

Keith

The ITEM?

I was flying over the Congo in a new white transforming car robot as I reflected on what Santa said about the item I took. I thought I had the perfect gift in mind, but Santa did not want me to have this. The tribesmen buckled in reverance since they thought the white robot was Santa, coming to claim the Item and hide it again!

The Item that I took from a tribe in the Congo was what I thought my enlightened mind was telling me, happened to be a bottle filled with an "Elixir of Life" that not only can cure cancer, but can cure death, meaning that anyone wo has just a drop of this could be immortal!

As I handed the Item over to the tribesmen, they were already prepared to hide it again once I left.

I was only thinking of how great a gift it would be to cure people, but not many are ready for "Immortality"! The Item is indestructible so that is why Santa could neve destroy it, so it is guarded, but it is given to certain people. Santa stated that we was given this gift when he mortal body was dying. Ever since then he traveled North and became Santa Claus!

I still needed to get gifts for Christmas, so I had to go with the fall back plan, but I was was blest to give my Nephew Quin, Niece Erin and our soon to be memeber of our Stangeland family Kaitlyn customized gifts from Santa with personalized letters form Santa and Mrs. Claus!

Santa was very busy and needed to get his shoppe in shape. Since I had so much time on my hands I fly the robot car back to the North Pole and gave Santa a helping hand:)

Next Time; Christmassed!

Peace!

Keith

Long Ride Down!

The ride was rough, mentally, but the motorbike was smooth riding! I could not beleive my eyes as I drove through the dimensions and how the grip of loneliness assaulted my mind! Without Santa's spiritual magic, I was wide open, but then I remembered! How could I forgot the power of the holy spirit? Santa and I must of been distracted by some kind of dark power for us not to remember!

I prayed as I drove and the ride was feeling like it would never end! I wondered what might be going through the minds of all the married and divorsed people as they are trapped in the dimension?

I wasn't getting any sense from the "Holy Spirit"! I was not sure what was going on? I then cried out to Jesus, and then, that was when I arrived!

Krampus 6; Greetings Keith! This time, you have no power on your side, and you can do nothing to save these people! Admit defeat!

I said nothing at first and admitted that the dimension that this Krampus was trapped in was overwhelming, but it is not "Hell" as in the biblical sense!

Krampus 6; Feel my pain!

Suddenly I witnessed what looked like phantoms, and thn I was feeling chains wrap around me, but none of these things were defeating me since I also noticed the "Holy Spirit" talking to me. He was always present, but this dimension tried to create so much noise as too drown out his words. It can not read our minds, but it can take guesses at what torments us, and deliver illusions to try weighing us down! It was at this moment that I was told exactly what to do!

Keith; Michael and Angela! You sing in a choir! Please start singing, and everyone else, please follow in singing with them!

Michael and Angela, broke their chains and followed instruction!

Krampus 6; What are you doing? No...the singing...NO...Stop!

Keith; Can't stand holy words, can ya?

The people started to follow Michael and Angela's lead and soon all were harmonizing! Whether they could sing or not, the "Holy Spirit" blest them with song, and they then sang Christmas Hymns!

Krampus 6; NO! Stop! I can't stand this!

And neither could the dimension as it started to rip open like wet paper and then all the people were in our dimension! Unfortunately, so was the Krampus!

Krampus 6; I am free, I am free at last! No longer am I trapped in Hell!

But the Krampus did not count on being infused to the dimension he was in and he started to slow fade away!

Krampus 6; NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I MUST HAVE MY REVENGE!

The Krampus grabbed me, but he quickly let go as his hands faded away.

Finally back in reality after feeling like I was in the dimension for an eternity! I was blest to know that it was not the REAL hell, or their would of been no escape! The couples were able to be transported ome by Santa's spiritual magic and I was then sent on my way to return the item that I had taken as a Christmas gift idea.

Next Time; The ITEM?

Peace!

Keith

Evil Revealed!

Krampus 6; Finally, I can escape once more, and bring about the world that my brothers and sisters tried to bring last year in the earth year of 2006! No more Santa, but my brethern and I punishing adults and children for being naughty! They will forever suffer! Santa merely has to enter this realm and I will have all the power I need!


Meanwhile back at Keith's place...

Santa; I will not be going to the Hell-Like Dimension.

Keith; What!? But Santa, how are we going to release all those people from the place?

Santa; If I step foot in that dimension, the evil presense known as the Krampus would absorb my magical power and enter this world again, but this time he could be here permenantly, and he could possibly reverse time to save his brothers and sisters from you, or I mean that blue fire alien you that destroyed them last year in 2006!

Keith; How should I do this?

Santa; If I cast any spiritual magic at this point, the Krampus will use it, so I do have something up my selve!

Santa truly did have something up his selve! It wasn't magic, but an amazing gadget that would expand on contact with air. It was a...

Santa; Dimensional Motorbike!

Keith; I never driven a motorbike, and do I need a license for this?

Santa; No! I have you fully registered, and it drives itself, because it has a robotic brain! All the magic is being pulled off of this motorbike by me, so the Krampus cannot use any of it against you!

Keith; So, I just ride this bike to Hell and back?

Santa; I can't really give you any words of advice, for that would also be applied as spiritual magic, so before you go, all spiritual magic will be pulled from you and you will be on your own....I know you can do this Keith! Oh, and by the way, one more thing.

Keith; Yes?

Santa; Return the item you took from the Congo when you return.

Keith; But that is my gift to my friends and family! You said that once I ate of the "Fruits of the Spirit" and focused on the ornament that I would know what to get them.

Santa; When did you think of this Item? Before or after you lost focus?

Keith lowers his head; After I lost focus..., but can I use just one drop of this...

Santa; NO! I am sorry to come off so harsh, but the item you chose will unbalance everything. This goes to show you that having all the "Fruits of the Spirit" at 100% will not bring you perfection!

Keith; I agree Santa! Wish me your best in that "Dark Hellish Dimension"?

Santa; I wil...I mean I cannot, it will apply spiritual magic. I am sorry Keith, but on this ride, you are all alone.


I put on the saftey helmet and activate the controls to bring me and my ride to Hell! Thanksfully it is not the real hell, but a dimension that trapped the Krampus! The solo Krampus must of stepped away from the battle last year that the "Blue Fire Alien" brought to their dimension? The explosion, as told by Santa, extermined all the Krampus. They were former Saints and Nuns that Saint Nickolas knew well, but were misguided by thinking that the world deserved "Judgement" rather than "Love"!

Krampus 6; So...Santa is wimping out and dsending his errand boy Keith in to this dimension! I will have to give him quite the reception! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Next Time; Long Ride Down!

Peace!

Keith

Bad to Worse! (With a dash of Hope)

Meanwhile in an undisclosed hellish location...

Dark Presense; Crazy bubbling married folks! That Michael and Angela ruined my attack on Keith! I have to admit I was anxious when I precast all my magic one powerful wish in dooming Keith and all of his single kind to hell! The spell ended up banishing Michael and Angela and all married folks to hell. Married folks are already misable! Singles don't always realize how good they got it! I was hoping avenge my brothers and sisters for what Keith did to them! With no power left to cast, I cannot banish him to a hellish existence!

The Dark Presense then peers into the snow globe, angerly, and then sees Santa ranting and raving. The Dark Presense then smiles and thinks, maybe the miscast was actually to his fortune?

Meanwhile back at Keith's townhouse!

Santa; Keith! All the parents are gone and the children are weeping. Well some of the children are weeping. Most are relived, and rejoicing, but I know they will eventually miss their parents. What is also odd is anyone who was married and currently are divorced are also missing? Only singles adults and children remain in this world!

Keith mutters; ...my single guys friends will love this new world...

Santa; Keith!!! Keep focused! Is the ornament of focus not wor...OH NO! Who smashed your ornament?

Keith; Not sure? Wait, let me check my voicemail on my phone? Ahhh! Michael and Angela called and whenever I don't answer they just show up at my house anyway without receiving a yes or no, in coming over. Giving them a house key was not...

Santa; That must be it?!

Keith; Santa, I am not tracking?

Santa; Michael and Angela are married? Yes?

Keith; Yes!

Santa; And they came in while you were away? They did not hear back from you and came looking and accidently smashed the ornament! Maybe this alerted an evil presence to your house?

Keith; Santa, you should be the NEW Sherlock Holmes!

Santa; I gave "Sir Arthur Conan Doyle" the idea of Sherlock Holmes!

Keith; Ok...so what you are saying is this dark presense came looking for me specifically, but why?

Santa; Maybe it wanted to get rid of you, and...by jove I GOT IT!

Keith; Sounding like Sherlock, Santa!

Santa; A powerful force cast, or maybe precast a spell to banish you and all your type to another dimension...maybe? Instead the married couple got in the way of the spell and it banished them and all married and divorced folks into another place?

Keith; Santa, I just found something odd! It looks like hair, and I don't own any pets.

Santa; Oh No! It's can't be?!

Meanwhile in an undisclosed hellish location...

The Dark Presence; You are a good detective, Santa! I am glad that you are troubled! Your troubled spirit will lead you right to me! Which is fortunate since I have no power to escape this place unless you come with all your powerful Christmas magic that I can use to my escape and manipulation of your world!!! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Next Time; Evil Revealed

Peace!

Keith

Singles Party!

This picture above is a reflection of what four guys I know, wanted Tom's Singles Christmas Party to look like! They did not get their wish! They were a bit upset about it. That is why I am not mentioning their names:) Anyway, I had a great time, as I sang Kareoke, and opened White Elephant gifts! I did find it odd that there were not many single women at the party?

Oh I forgot to mention what happened on Saturday late morning as I was over the Congo? I bet you are more interested in what happened over the Congo and how I managed to make it to the "Singles Christmas Party"?


Well here it is:)

I was quickly plummeting from the sky, due to ice build up, and thought that it might be due to being to high up in the atmospere, until I seen from the rear view mirror a icy monstrosity!

Suddenly the screen popped up again and Santa has another pre-recorded message!

Santa on the screen; Ho! Ho! Ho! Keith, I forgot to mention some important features of this car I gave you. That is what I get for being over 1800 years old! Ho! Ho! Ho! In case of ice build up, just simply press the "Ice Blue" button! Santa, over and out! Ho! Ho! Ho!

I immediately pressed the "Ice Blue" button and melted the ice build up and gave the icy monstrosity a hot foot! The ice mostrosity seemly disappeared and I gently descended towards the Congo and closer to my goal!

As I landed the tribes people guarding the item ran off frightened by my robot car! I obtained the item and started to take off! (Wondering what the item is? Time for patience, readers:)

As I headed upward the ice mostrosity came at me again and this time I was fully ready for it as I gave it a fireblast and send it towards the gassy swamp! A small explosion erupted and I did not see it anywhere.

Heading back West I encountered another threat! This time a fiery beast grappled the robot car, and causing it to quickly overheat! The screen popped up again! And the pre-recorded Santa message said...

Santa on the screen; Ho! Ho! Ho! I forgot to mention the time jumping feature that you can use! Since you are an honorary "Time Agent" I thought you would enjoy this feature! Press the "Brown Button"! Ho! Ho! Ho! Santa, over and out!

I immediately press the "Brown Button" and returned home, but it was too late for the robot car. It was damaged beyond repair.

This is when I called my single friend Marc for a ride to the "Singles Christmas Party"!

After a good nights rest, I found a few things odd on Sunday morning?! Michael and Angela's car was in the driveway and they were nowhere to be found in the house. Also odd was when I called my parents and they did not answer their phone? They always answer!

Suddenly a load noise cam from my chimney and Santa popped out very frantic! He uttered...

Santa; Keith!!! All the parents in the world are missing! What did you do? How did this happen?

Next Time; Bad to Worse!

Peace!

Keith

Forgetfulness!

Michael and Angela pull up to Keith's house and notice an astounding structure!

Angela; Michael! What is that? Is that a robot?

Michael; Sure looks like one...I wonder what's it is doing...OHHH! It just rocketed to the skies!

Angela; WOW!!! I can't wait to tell Keith about this!

Michael and Angela hurry inside and as they try to find Keith, Angela accidently bumps into Keith's Christmas tree! The ornament drops and shatters across the floor!

Michael; Oops Angela! I hope that wasn't expensive?

Angela; It sure looked expensive!

Meanwhile...rocketing skyward!

Keith; What is going on? Last I remember I finally got into the drivers seat and hit the green botton and now, I can't seem to focus?

Keith is just minutes away from entering the atmosphere!!! And while that is going on! Inside an icy palace! Talking to a crature that only he can hear!

Jack Frost; You want me to do what? Why is he so important? He is going to do what??? Ok, Ok, I understand now, we can't let that happen! It could unbalance everything! I will take care of him immediately!

Meanwhile heading closer towards space! Keith is able to take control over the robot!

Keith; Finally! I thought I was going to be lost in space! This thing has one heck of a throttle! Ok, time try and focus, but the probably is that I am unable to? I thought that ornament was able to help with focus even in long distances? Oh well, I do remember that the item I seek is in Africa! Next stop, the Congo! I always wanted to go to the Congo:) I better make it fast so I don't miss the "Christmas Singles Party" that Tom is hosting!

Suddenly the robot gets hit hard, but the shields hold! Unfortunately Keith notices that the robot seems to be gaining mass!

Keith; What is this thing doing know? Did I hit another botton by mistake? Best check my monitor?

Keith flips on the rear montior and views a horrific site!

Meanwhile back at Keith's place. Michael and Angela are busy on the computers and encounter a sopt of trouble!

Angela; Michael! Did you hear that?

Michael; Hear what?

Angela: That?!

Michael; I don't hear anything, maybe you hear...oh my...!!!

Dark Presense; So you thought you could just simply forget about me! You and Santa!!! Wait!...who are you two? What are you two doing in Keith's house???

Next Time; Singles Party!

Peace!

Keith

Finally, Mobility!!!

After much concentration, and becan to sit down, on a Saturday morning with some difficultly due to my hip being immoblized in a brace:( and I starting consuming the Fruits.

With each bite I experienced love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

As soon as I was done with the very last drop of the fruits juices, I immediately experienced an awareness of a malevolent precense! Then it hide itself away and I could no longer sense it. It sent chills up my spine!

My next step would be to check on my car since Santa said that this is how I was going to get around!

I enter the car as best as I could with my healing right hip and as I turned the key, a screen popped up!

Santa on the screen; Ho! Ho! Ho! I trust that you ate and enjoyed all the fruits of the spirit? Now it is time to go get those gifts! Press the red button, only after you left the garage! Very important!

Keith; But Santa, my right leg is my driving leg and I can't drive yet!

Santa on the screen; "This is a prerecorded message, not a two way communication." Ho! Ho! Ho! And God Bless your journey Keith! Over and out!

Now what do I do, I can't drive my car? Then Suddenly an elf appeared in my passenger seat but only for an instant!

Elf 1; Here you go Keith! Read carefully! Santa forgot to give you this! He is getting forgetful in his old age of 1800. Bye bye now and have a joyous Christmas!

Keith; Wait! I can't even read the cover! Ahh...he disappeared in a hurry!

As I opened the book, the instruction manual was all in elvish! I hope they are making their toys better than making mistakes of who can read what! Then I remember the focus ornament on my Christmas tree and after about five minutes of focusing I was able to read elvish!

After 20 minutes of reading I found nothing on how to not use my leg to drive the car:( I figured, no pain no gain and I used the garage door opener and drove out of the garage, with my leg throbbing really bad I still made it to the driveway. Then I pushed the red buttom as instructed by the pre-recorded Santa, and I then realized that I forgot to buckle up!

As I was sent flailing through out my car the car seemed to grow in size and as I managed to see in the rear view mirror, a spectacular sight! My car is a "Transformering Robot Car"!

I was so excited to try out this robot, but then I remembered that I need to get all my shopping in before the "Singles Christmas Party" at Tom's house on Saturday night!

So far I am not any closer to figuring out how to move this robot or myself as I lay like a hopeless rag doll inside the robot car.

One thing I realized, is I am not really focusing on what gifts to get each person, so while I can do nothing else by lay here, and watch my neighbors gawk at my robot car standing in my driveway, I might as well think of what to get...Ahh ha! I got it!

Meanwhile Michael and Angela call Keith's cell phone!

Michael; Keith's not answering his phone. Oh well, let's go over to his house anyway!

Next Time; Forgetfulness!

Peace!

Keith

Santa's Gifts to Keith!

Santa; HO! HO! HO! Keith, these gifts will help you better understand your friends and family!

Keith; Ahhh...Santa this gift is an ornament?

Santa; Keith my good friend, this gift needs to be hung on your tree while you use them.

Keith; What are they?

Santa; Hang this on your tree.

As I hung the ornament, I had amazing focus! I am normally distracted by bright lights and shiny objects, but when this ornament was hanging, I was focused well.

Santa; Make sure that the ornament is secure for if it drops, you will be unfocused again, and if it breaks, it is completely unuseable.

Keith; Santa, this next gift looks to big to be on my tree?

Santa; Unwrap it, and see?

Keith; Ahhh, Santa, what does a fruit basket have to do with me helping pick out quality gifts for friends and family? Not many of them eat very healthly.

Santa; Keith, you are not judging by appearance. Here have a taste of this apple!

As I bit into the apple, I felt incredible "Peace" that surpassed all my understanding!

Keith; WOW! Santa, let me guess, is this "Fruit of the Spirit"?

Santa; (Clapping) HO! HO! HO! Very good Keith! You are well focused and after you consume all that fruit, you will be ready for finding quality gifts!

Keith; Ahhh, all the fruit?

Santa; Every last drop, or it will not last long!

Keith; Santa, I already have access to "Fruit of the Spirit".

Santa; This fruit will give you 100% perfection in all "Fruit of the Spirit" for 48 hours.

Keith; I am going to have one heck of a tummy ache!

Santa; Ho! Ho! Ho! You will be fine, the fruit is holy. Ho! Ho! Ho!

Keith; One more important detail Santa, all this focus and fruits of the Spirit won't be able to get me mobile without your help.

Santa; Remember, I have more gifts to give you, but these come first. Once you have concentrated your focus on gift giving and ate all the fruit, then work your way to your car. Now, enjoy and I will be back periodicly through the week to give you your other gifts!

And then Santa flew up the chimney!

Keith; Looks like I need to get my grub on?

Next Time; Finally Mobility!

Peace!

Keith

Homecoming!

Well, it has been about 5 weeks out of full right hip surgery and I am still feeling very useless. I can barely geet around with a walker and I tried using the Quad cane the other day (Coining by Seth Forness as sounding like a very cool weapon) and I am paying for it today with lots of pain in my back that I had to turn back to my Vicodin, rather than Tylenol:(

I would of Blogged earier in my recovery, but I was on my parents dail up connection and that is not fun to play with. I stayed with my folks for about 4 weeks and they were sad to see me go, but glad that I was feeling well enough to get plugged back into my place again.

I thought I was going to receive a grander homecoming, but instead I was greated by "Egg People" in my bed room. Not sci fi at all, but a clever decoration/prank by my roomie Nate and good friend Craig Larson A.K.A. "Time Walker" I did appreciate it, but I am always imagining my friends popping up and yelling "Welcome Home"!

A lot has happened since I been laid up. I am thankfully on "Short Term" disability from work so I am glad to get a full paycheck while I heal.

The Christmas Season is fast approaching and I still have not got my Christmas shopping completed! I was glad that the internet makes things easy, but not everything can be found on the internet!

Thankfully I called in one of my connections! He came rather quickly, as only he can:)

I heard the echoing from the fireplace upstairs and as I hobbled upstairs with my crutches, he uttered...

Santa; Ho! Ho! Ho! Seasons Greetings my dear friend Keith! How are you feeling today?

Me; Not to well Santa. I feel like I got hit by a Mach Truck!

Santa; I am guessing you don't want a Mach Truck for Christmas?

Me; Nope, cause I might get hit by it:)

Santa; HO! HO! HO! Very funny! I got somethings that is going to help you in your Christmas shopping.

Me: Wait Santa, I thought in calling you in that you would be able to get the gifts for me?

Santa; I don't pick up "Gift Cards" and besides, they are not a true gift! Couldn't you be more creative?

Me; Santa, I just like giving friends and family access to their own gifts?

Santa; Get to know your friends and family better Keith! Besides, you have plenty of time now that you are recovering? I am sorry to be so hard on you, but maybe after I give you these gifts, you will reconsider "Gift Cards"?

Me; Ok Santa, what are they?

Next Time; Santa's Gifts to Keith!

Peace!

Keith